15 March 2012

To Wean Or Not To Wean - That Is The Question!

About 6 months ago I posted on night weaning. Honestly, not a lot has changed since then.

Jaron still nurses 3 times a night. Bedtime, around 1am, and between 6 & 8am. (Daytime doesn't start until 9am around our house - result of Jake's typical workday ending at 230am-ish most nights.)

He still nurses before nap.

And he still asks to nurse at least 2 other random times during the day.

I've been trying to semi-wean for weeks now. By semi-wean I mean just cut down on the number of sessions to 2-3 in a 24 hour period. We tried going slow and only cutting out one and it didn't seem to work they weren't scheduled so I never knew when or which to drop. So finally I cut out all of our day sessions except naptime.

Not nursing during the day is going well as long as I can keep him busy. If he gets bored then his demands for milk turn into whining and temper tantrums.

So, fter a few days of things going ok, I tried to cut out our 1am session.

After 2 nights being up from 1am until 3 am, plus the hormonal havoc that was occurring due to weaning and the time of the month, I gave up on trying to change that one!

I figure since he hasn't stopped asking to nurse during the day that maybe we'll just work on getting through that for now. My hormones seem to have stabilized some since deciding that and last night the boys actually slept in their own beds, so I got to get some good quality sleep and that helped my outlook and sanity a TON.

With Aedyn I weaned when I was "supposed" to. Twelve months and we began cutting out sessions, by the time he was 13 months, he was even losing interest in his bedtime nursing. The loss of interest and my ubersensitive nipples from a new pregnancy meant the end of our nursing relationship.

Jaron is 16.5 months and nowhere near that point. I'm pretty sure that him still nursing so much is why #3 isn't on the way just yet. (After everyone I knew telling me how breastfeeding didn't work as birth control, we seem to be doing just fine with it...)

That's a big part of why I'm ready to wean, I don't really want the kids more than 2.5 years apart so waiting more than another 2 months will be cutting it close.

At the same time, I don't want to rush Jaron and I'm not ready to handle the long nights that come with night weaning.

But, I'm also just ready to have a break from breastfeeding. I'm afraid I'm about to open a huge can of worms here.

I love the fact and am proud that I can nourish my child with my body. But breastfeeding in and of itself...I don't enjoy it. I hear people gush about how they love breastfeeding and I'm happy for them, but personally I don't.

To me it's how you feed your baby, it's natural, it's free, it's convenient. (Honestly, it's the way I grew up and what I believe. From the time I was little I've known that a bottle is not the best and formula is the ultimate last resort.) It's what I have expected to do since forever.

But I can't wait to be done. I'm eagerly looking forward to about 6 years from now when hopefully our 4th child will be fully weaned and I can get the breast reduction that I've been waiting on since I was 18. I declined it then because of the risk of not being able to breastfeed.

I'm tired of having to wear clothes that are breastfeeding friendly. At my cup size, it's not easy or discrete to nurse in public; more often than not it requires two hands to arrange everything in a comfortable manner. And I found out that sometimes laying the baby on your lap while you get situated doesn't mean they will stay still and not roll or wiggle off. Awkward.

The clothing difficulties being what they are, I long to just pick up and cuddle Jaron without him fussing for "mnilks" and having to either put him down or deal with the hassle of half undressing myself for him to nurse for 2 minutes and be done. (Although hearing him say "mnilks, peasse" is about the most adorable thing ever!)

So, in truth: I'm ready for Jaron to be weaned, but I'm not ready for the actual process of weaning. He's not ready to wean and I'm not ready to do more than gently encourage. It might take awhile, but we'll figure it out and be all the better for taking our time and not rushing it. At the very least I'll never have to worry that I weaned too soon!

How do you really feel about breastfeeding and weaning? Read the other great posts from the Breastfeeding BlogHop (hosted by The Slacker Mom, The Gnome's Mom, and Happiness Redefined) and link up your own!!

And if you want to hear more about my 2 (not always) sleeping babies and the rest of the family you can follow us on Google+Facebook, and Twitter!

2 comments:

  1. I'm having some of the same issues with wanting to wean but him not being ready and mine is 23 months old! I had no problem weaning my older two but that is because they weaned themselves.  I just don't really know how to go about it without causing a tantrum or something.  I also worry that he doesn't eat enough other foods to gain weight properly. 

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  2. The weight gain on other foods is one of the reasons I wanted him to day wean, although it was a minor one. He seems to be ok with me offering a slice of cheese instead of nursing (actually gets excited about it) so I feel better knowing that he is getting some good calories from that.

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