The History of My Valentine & Me ~ Part 4

I promise that this is the final post about how Jake and I met and finally got engaged. Of course then there's what happened on our honeymoon. Not that! Ok, well that happened too, but I was talking about how we lost our one ATM card, had no cash, phone got blocked and traveling in general...Maybe I'll tell that story around our anniversary!

So, check out Part 1, Part 2, & Part 3 and here's the story of how he proposed.

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I'd been living in Saint Louis for a couple weeks, had found a job, and was starting adjust. Jake was getting more and more frustrated by having to introduce me to people and explain that while the wedding date was set, deposits paid, and everything reserved, we were not officially engaged.

We'd been talking for awhile about enjoying the fall weather and wanting to go on a picnic before the weather turned cold. We'd talked about how we love playing board games an how neither of us had been able to find a decent chess partner in a long time. We actually went out at one point a bought a chess set, but it sat in the car unopened and untouched.

So it wasn't a huge surprise when Jake asked me to go to the park for a picnic. What was a little weird was that he asked a day in advance; we weren't exactly advance planners. I said ok and I'd see him at the house when I got off work.

So the next day I got off work and things got interesting. I drove to the house and changed clothes and waited. And waited. I finally called and asked where he was. His answer "I'm here." I replied that I was sitting out in front of the house and didn't see him. That was when we figured out that "the house" was supposed to be his house and I had understood it to be my house. Oops.

I headed north and when I arrived Jake came rushing out of the house. It was odd because he wasn't normally watching for me, but I figured he was just hungry. We ran through the KFC drive-thru and went to the park.

We spread out the blanket and sat down to eat, only to realize that KFC had forgotten to include any flatware or napkins in the bag. FUN! So we ate the chicken and fished out green beans with our fingers and used the chicken bones to scoop out mashed potatoes, laughing the whole time.

After we finished, or just got tired of eating like cavemen. Jake pulled out the chess set and we started to set up. As always I'm white and open my brand new bag of pieces and begin to set up. That's when I realize that the queen was missing. I was slightly frustrated that something else had gone wrong, but it was a pretty cheap set (I had a nice one that I was bringing up from my parents house, so we didn't want to spend a ton for a temporary set.) so I started to look around for a rock or something to stand in.

Jake reached in his pocket and pulled out a leather pouch and told me "Here, you can just use this." I was a little bit amused, I thought the pouch probably held some Dungeons & Dragons figurine, I knew he'd played casually a few years before in Florida, but I didn't realize he'd carry a figure around with him still.

Well, it wasn't a D&D figurine. It was my missing queen with a ring around her!

He asked me to be his wife and of course I said YES! So we played chess.

Jake had taken the game in the night before and had sliced open the bag to remove the queen, then he glued the bag back together. He'd been so nervous about me figuring everything out and that I'd noticed the bag. I was clueless.

My ring was just a simple band, we would go later to pick out a stone and bridal band. But it gave him something to offer me and I was just thrilled he asked!

We were married April 26, 2008 in Florida. Everything didn't go perfectly, but it was us. And it was beautiful.

The History of My Valentine & Me ~ Part 3

When I started telling our story last week I had no idea it would actually take this many posts, but I guess it's unrealistic to expect 10 years to fit into just a few hundred words. Be sure to check out Part 1 and Part 2 from last week!

Jake was planning a trip home to Florida (he had moved to Saint Louis, MO while I was in Mexico) in May 2007. I was also making a trip home, but not until June. I told him we would just miss each other and we both were disappointed that we wouldn't be able to catch up in person.

Then the unthinkable happened. He changed his plans to match mine.I knew he was serious then. Jake never changed plans for anyone, he did what he wanted when he wanted and everyone worked around him (and we wonder where our 3 year-old gets it from).

I was home for a few days before he got into town. My house was the first place he came and we saw each other for the first time in two years. It was definitely interesting seeing him in person rather than just talking on the phone.

And then we fit years into days. His friends reminded him of all the reasons he had for not dating or marrying me in the past. We went on a date, walked on the beach, and looked at wedding venues.

He asked my dad for my hand.

Then he and my family took me to the airport and I went home to Mexico. To say the next 6 weeks were a blur would be an understatement. I tied up all my loose ends, transported myself and my cat back to Florida for 2 weeks to plan the wedding and then took a week traveling to see my extended family before finally ending up in St. Louis.

I stayed with a family that was friends with Jake until close to the wedding. Everyone that he knew up there was practically in shock. They hadn't even knew I existed until 4 months before I arrived. And apparently he had several not-so-secret-admirers who were less than thrilled at my arrival.

To make matters more complicated I wouldn't let him call me his fiancee. He'd asked my dad, but he hadn't actually proposed. And until he actually asked I wasn't labeling myself. In his defense, the reason he hadn't asked was because he wanted my input on my ring and didn't want to ask without the ring. (I couldn't convince him that while I'd love the ring when he proposed, the ring wouldn't change my answer.)

As a side note: I would never advise anyone to move to another country, a place where you have no friends, no family, work on rekindling and developing a relationship with someone, even if you know you love them. Take it in stages. The reverse culture shock, getting over past hurts in our relationship, me finding a job, Jake changing jobs, and planning a long distance wedding and not stressors that should be trifled with!

And I've gone long winded again! I'll tell you how he proposed tomorrow, even knowing it was coming, I was totally surprised!

The History of My Valentine & Me ~ Part 2

Yesterday I posted how Jake and I met and what happened during the first 5 years or so.

During everything that happened, I'd get upset when things weren't working out for us, but I knew that in the end of it all if we were supposed to be together it would happen eventually.

After Jake told me that he could never marry me, I cried, a lot. But I knew he'd change his mind eventually if it was supposed to be.

I graduated college and moved to Puebla, Mexico for a couple years and taught at an international day school. I talked to a couple different guys, but no one I actually dated. I realized at some point that the way I phrased my standards when I'd talk about them made them impossible to be met by anyone but Jake.

As I was coming up on the end of my second year and had to decide whether or not to renew my contract. I got a very interesting MySpace message from Jake. Something I thought I'd never hear even if we got back together one day. He apologized.

He apologized for leading me on, lying to me, and not appreciating my friendship. He didn't expect me to write back. He wrote the message thinking it was some sort of cathartic and then move on type of thing.

He didn't expect me to write back and for a day or so I didn't.

And then I did, telling him of course I forgave him and I'd like to try and be friends again. So we started chatting online and messaging, just getting caught up on the past couple of years.

Then he asked for my phone number, I had a VOIP (voice over internet phone) so although I lived in another country, I had a Florida phone number.

During the early days when I was still in highschool Jake and I emailed and talked on the phone, he would write that he loved me but he never said it out loud. This time I was pretty reserved and specific about how things would go.

I told him I wasn't going to play games this time, if he wanted something he had to tell me. Which he did. And that was my students and friends first clue that something was up, I walked through the school gates humming "I'm Walking On Sunshine."

And I wouldn't let him tell me that he loved me online or over the phone. I still wasn't completely convinced that this would actually pan out. But I hoped...

Well, I thought I'd be able to finish the story today, but there's still quite a bit left, check back on Tuesday for Part 3!

The History of My Valentine & Me ~ Part 1

Jake and I have a lot of history. I've alluded to it in this post and this post, but in honor of Valentine's Day I thought I'd share our story.

Jake and I met when I was 15 years old. I had just rescued a baby duck from outside the ballet studio and he had been talked into joining the ballet company by another dancer that he was more than a little interested in. He asked to see the duckling and I watched him like a hawk until he handed her back.

I saw him a lot after that, multiple rehearsals a week for weeks on end. Things ended up not working out between him and the girl he was trying to date and on my 16th birthday he started flirting with me. I should probably mention that he is 5 years older than me. So my parents would not even consider letting me go out alone with him and I was not the rebellious type. So not a whole lot happened that year.

I take that back, I'm not sure who, but someone from the ballet studio fed my dad some lies and my parents reacted by banning me from being around him in any form except what we had to do for the the dance rehearsals. By the time they found out the truth it was 6 months later and they agreed to let him take my to my prom.

For the next 18 months, we flirted, he ignored me, we flirted, he ignored me, I went to college, I came home, I turned 18 and he kissed me for the first time. My dad apparently talked to him at some point and told him not to do anything to keep me from going to school.

He told me that he didn't want a long distance relationship. We stayed friends, kind of.

I stalked his MySpace and messaged or called him occasionally. If he wasn't dating someone I got a warm, friendly response. If he was, well, it wasn't so warm.

I dated someone else, got engaged, broke it off. Rebounded into Jake, who was also rebounding. We went on a date, he kissed me, then told me he still didn't want a long distance relationship.

Another 18 months passed and he took me to dinner for my 21st birthday. We went back to his place to watch a movie. He leaned in to kiss me, but this time I stopped him and asked him if he was going to apologize and say he didn't want a long distance relationship again. He got flustered and started spouting of excuses and holier than thou type stuff.

Somewhere in all of that as he drove me home he told me that he could never really love me like I deserved and he'd never marry me and freed me from any commitment I felt like I had to him. Great birthday present!

So that's the first part of our story, check back on Thursday for Part 2!!!

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